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Re: The Truth In Lies 2: 7/7 The Great Yorkshire Patsies


"My names Mike, not abaddon1215, that's just a nickname. Yes Mr Pike, I've wanted to talk to you for sometime regarding those reptoid people while I was kidnapped."
"Feel free, we have a lot of time, mike" I retorted.
"[sign in to see URL] you'll be shocked. I have some difficulty in divulging the secrets I hold; I need to trust you Mr Pike. Yes?"
"Fair do's" I replied.
"It all started back in Febuary of this year. I was on a forum on the internet playing a parody role-play story game called 'the lies in truth'. Me and this other chap from Britain played as you two, mocking the two of you for kicks. Somehow though, maybe using keywords searches of the internet they found me."
"Who found you," I questioned.
"The big boys"
"Nooo, really. Who? illuminati? masons? bilderbergers? reptoids? Who?"
Something had shaken poor Mike. One of the evil groups had hurt him mentally and the simple mention of their name made him stop and reflect on the ills done onto him.
"[sign in to see URL] was all of them. I was on my computer at the time, that's when they came. Ironically I was mocking you and Derik, thinking that you were the bad guys, not knowing I had been an ignorant bastard. I just finished posting on the forum when they burst in. There were six of the bastards there, these were huge !@#$ reptoids though not people. It freaked me; I didn't know what to think. Had I accidentally taken some sort of drug? Was this a prank? Yah know stuff like that."
I stopped him there with a simple hand gesture then once again delved into my rucksack, this time to get my tape recorder. This was golden stuff. While he spoke I thought about the money I could bathe in with this story. Sod Fergal, Mike was my new best friend. A sequel to my most popular book perhaps? The Largest secret 2: In with the reptoids - blood soaked rituals with Michael Morris?
"Go on Mike, carry on"
"Okay. So then they chloroformed me and when I was awoken I was in Scotland. God, my god it was cold. I heard a gong that's what woke me, and I soon found I was naked and tide up to some kind of phallic rock. It was a nightmare I thought to myself, I couldn't be here."
"Who was there?" I questioned curiously.
"What reptoids you mean? Well, everyone from royalty to presidents to business tycoons. The hierarchy."
"Oh"
"Anyway, it was in the morning when I was woken by this gong and soon I saw some reptoids wandering about. It was sort of like a retreat or holiday camp. There were reptoids everywhere; they had reptoid ice cream venders, cleaners, reps too. It was just so weird, too hard to comprehend that this was real yah know. Anyway I stayed tied to the rock for the most part of my kidnapping and hope was dwindling with each passing second. The reptoids ignored me really, they patronised me and intimidated me by approached me with their mouths wide open. Prince Harry, Prince William and a few of the Bush and Blair kids kicked me in the balls for a while though. They pointed at me and referred to me as the “weak petulant human turd”, while kicking me some more later. Presidents Bush and Clinton also passed me and spat at me, then while they kept me occupied with their evil stare Tony Blair came up behind me and urinated all over me with his huge 2-foot reptoid penis. His piss stung like acid. I screamed to no avail while all these bastards laughed. Crazy !@#$, man. I knew my time would be over soon and now blessed every passing second and hoped my life would end soon.”
This was a shocking story of one man’s struggle at a reptoid retreat. He was their meal. so how did he get out?
“How did you get out?”, I questioned furthermore.
“Very strange that. Yah know, how I got out an all. After two days tied to the rock I was completely out, so I didn’t know how I got out till Alex, the other guy on the forum told me. He kept an eye on the forum and after the days of me not being on there posting and the like he knew intuitively that something was wrong. So he researched and found out that this place in Scotland was a hotbed for reptoid sightings. Soon after getting a location he stole a helicopter and rescued me. Amazing I know, but true. Since then we teamed up with crazy Cort way back there. Exposing the truth and protecting him from an unknown force that wants him dead. He refuses to believe that reptoids rule the world but I somehow know that his mind with alter that view very soon. I didn’t believe till they came for me.”
From side of us further up the tunnel there was activity.
“More the !@#$ up, don’t slack you gothic piece of crap” came a voice.
Soon they approached and stopped near to us. One was holding a gun and wearing the same camo gear as Mike. I assumed he was a minder too. In captive were the rest of the angst kids who, I believe, at least one anyway through the spear at Fergal.
The guy in camo was Alex, he was babyfaced cutey but was up himself, Dorian Grey style. However, he was a nice guy whom wished no harm unto anyone, apart for these angst kids anyway.
He lined then up facing the wall and shot them one-by-one. Derik turned away, I stood there and watched. I felt I needed too, for Fergal’s sake and the money I could have bathed in, as well the movie and Oprah too.
He came up to me but moved passed, arrogantly raw from his killings. Derrik walked up to him, but he seemed very negative sporting a frown with that “I don’t care look” on his chevy chase.
Derik knew what to do.


---


9/27/2005, 5:54 pm Link to this post Send Email to knights   Send PM to knights
 
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Re: The Truth In Lies 2: 7/7 The Great Yorkshire Patsies


Tonight's thrilling episode is brought to you from the desk of YENEHC KCID, an unsong Reptillian hero to all of Earth. Take one moment to ponder this being, but one of the master monster race. Then continue reading, and know Alex will be next on Soiled Virgin Rock.

Episode **- "As My Mind Gently Bleeds" OR "The Medium Mister Edwards"

When last the story was told, the putridly humanoid Alex and the non-shape shifting(how pathetic!) Abaddon1215 had revealed themselves in the tubes. Indeed, these two beings were verbally sexualizing with several other terrorists, those being Pike and Okra.

Several times, we had nearly captured the supergenius(by human standards) Pike. The Canadian(read as the US State of Northern Illinois) government were very close to jailing Pike, but it was not to be. How he escaped, like Alice and her friends in wonderland, and, by the by, do not read Pike's book either. He uses this literature to indoctrinate your children against sleeping and towards listening, but let me tell you something: it is comfort to sleep. It is the belief of your betters that among Pike's various problems is the lack of sleep. We thusly believe that his genius mind, like all human minds, will or probably has curdled without sleep.

Derik Okra is a nothing to us, but his presence helps us to discredit Pike. This Okra believes himself to be one that talks to spirits, but don't worry. Our operatives are the ghosts that Okra speaks to. We have his ear and we often tell him any lie that comes to mind.

As we have been told time and again in our daily meetings, Abaddon1215 and Alex are a great asset to our cause. These humans are helping in the cause to discredit Pike and Okra, and, amazingly, they make us laugh! Otherwise, Alex is secretly a Breadmason(trademark in US, UK, Jap). He will be kept in control, or else sentenced to a life internment in the Cattle Of Earth. Abaddon1215 has his own troubles. If he is seen on an MS Traffic Camera Control Your World in the mainland, he will be Patriot Acted into oblivion alongside the likes of the American Green Party and Tom Crooze's partially human birth parents.

So have no fears of these four non-Reptillians.

They were observed destroying the Angst Kids, who were our operatives but were of such limited mental faculty that they often did more harm than good. Goodbye Angst Kids, but we will make more. (Memo: call up Limp Bisquit as suitably low-profile replacements)

Again, I will take a moment to reiterate that this was a win-win situation, sort of like Jews and Blacks fighting to the death. Our MS Easy Hurricane Creater 5.2 Professional Edition(with Big Easy templates) could never yield destruction as perfect as watching these two sets of deviates fight!

It was going to happen, The Deluge In The Tubes, but it wasn't meant to be. The destruction of these fools would be more perfect than any Official Reptillian Plan.

As the idiot Derik Okra made his move, our operative did the same. Thusly, a more perfect medium re-entered this tale: the Reptillian that calls himself John Edward for purposes of commerce.

So, pathetic PodPeople humans, know that dozens of human women and children will be reserved in the White House, so that John Edwards might sate his appetite after killing these terrorist motherfu**ers

---
You see-there are two kinds of people in this world: those with loaded guns and those who dig. You dig.
9/28/2005, 3:36 am Link to this post Send Email to abaddon1215   Send PM to abaddon1215 MSN Yahoo Blog
 
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Re: The Truth In Lies 2: 7/7 The Great Yorkshire Patsies


From the corner of my eye I saw a strange sight, one which I couldn't believe. John Edwards was dead, Cort killed him, and well I thought that anyway. So there he was staggering towards, but bleeding profusely from the chest. Derik was alarmed. Was his dream of more airtime on the TV just silly thinking? In a Christian way Derik moved forward and steadied John upright to stop him from falling over. I didn't know what to think about that, though it could have a sort of truce that if John would survive they could be a tag-team on the mediumship circuit and lie furthermore to desperate parents who have lost their kids to some serial killer or something. Derik rested John against the wall, maybe he knew he wouldn’t survive much longer. Suddenly he bagan to speak, John that is.
"[sign in to see URL]. I have someone who wants to speak to you, his name is Khan. Mohammed Khan. One of the patsies."
As soon a John said the name Khan, Derik turned to me knowing we had a lead for our book, the great yorkshire patsies.
John spoke once more "Khan is coming through, I'm bringing him into my body. You talk to him now."
Derik shouted wanting to connect with Khan, but nothing came for a few seconds, just silence. Then John began to spasm. Khan was indeed coming through.
"Al Qauda? Is is it true Mr Khan?" Derik inquired.
The spasms stopped. John seemed dead for a moment, but then got up unaided albeit still wounded. Khan had possessed his body, although I’m still a skeptic to dead people channelled through doucebags. Mr Edwards once claimed he channelled the soul singer Barry White. According to Derik who was at the live tape recording, in real time Barry White was brought through as a gangster rapper who went on about popping fellow rappers like Tu Pac and beating up honkeys. In the edited television version however, it was shown differently.
Edwards’ apparently possessed body moved forward, and then grabbed Derik.
Then he, the patsy spoke. “Allah Akbar, what the hell am doing here. Who the hell are you!”
Derik replied. “I’m Derik Okra, world famous spirit medium. Your currently being channelled through the vessel that is the world worst spirit medium, John Edwards.”
Khan was angry. “What the hell, you pull me out of martyrdom with 50 virgins for this crap. Go away, and let me go away too. I can’t help you arsehole, try speaking to shaz, he’ll be friendlier and more helpful.”
“One quick question please” Derik begged.
“Ask Shaz Tanweer, now !@#$ off you infidel.”
Mr Khan was gone and to be honest the mention of martyrdom could have meant they did perpetrate the bombings. I suppose we’ll find out in time I thought to myself, for sure.
As Khan went back to his supposed heaven Edwards returned to him body. He dropped down to the floor and did seem unconscious. Derik knelt down and felt for a pulse.
“No pulse” I said.
Derik replied solemnly, “No. he’s gone.” Derik wiped a tear from his eye and got up again. Cort’s two minders watched all that transpired and laughed. They too, like me were sceptics.
It was a scene of death. With a body count of now eight I felt unlucky. Had it all been like this because of me, a jinx.
To get my mind off that I turned back to Mike who was nattering with young Alex about Edwards. “Alex, do yah mind if I have a few seconds with Mike here?”
Alex didn’t say anything, but moved away as though shunning me. I pulled my tape recorder out once again so I could ask a couple more questions.
“Yes, Dave. What now?”
“It’s about those reptoids you saw. What did they look like? Describe them.”
Mike paused, then continued, “They were big I know that, but it was so long ago I don’t remember that much about it, or them. I feel uncomfortable about talking about it now; it has scarred me for life yah know.”
“What colour were their eyes?”
Mike did seem uncomfortable now I was being specific. The question made him pause once more for thought. Was he lying I thought. Was he part of the evil elite sent here to !@#$ us up or perhaps kill us?
Then he answered my question.
“Their eyes [sign in to see URL]…[sign in to see URL]! Yes, I’m sure they were blue.”
He was lying. All my sources had told me they were either green or deep green in colour. I had been hoaxed by the stupid bush lovin’ American.
“Yes, that’s right.” I said, trying to deter him from my suspicions.
So much for Revelations of the Phallic Survivor. Damn, that video could have netted me thousands. Arghhhh!!!!!

--Log in or sign up to see linked image content--

I wondered back over to Derik who was resting against the wall and whispered in his ear about the shocking truth. Replying he said “I had my doubts. These guys are pranksters, I knew. Let’s try moving on. Bethnal Green station is just ahead.”
“Okay.”
Suddenly a noise came from behind us back at king’s cross, it was Cort, the graveyard shift guy.
He screamed. “Their here! Back there. Two of em. Their trying to kill me!”
Then he emerged, coming nearer to the four of us, with the spear in tow.


Last edited by knights, 9/28/2005, 8:18 pm


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9/28/2005, 12:20 pm Link to this post Send Email to knights   Send PM to knights
 
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Re: The Truth In Lies 2: 7/7 The Great Yorkshire Patsies


We were at Bethnal Green station. Looking back down the track from where we had just come we saw Mike, Alex and Cort. It was dark back there and seeing a scuffle between them and two other people made us hop straight on to the platform and head for the stairs.
It was a 50/50 situation, we were at risk down there but above those stairs of course the police may be gathered. We slowed are pace as we walked up about 20-30 steps, not knowing who or what was round the next corner. Could the reptoids be here, or a fully armed swat team ordered to take us out. Dave was panting heavily expecting the worst; I however was taking it calmly, using my stealth striding up the banister with my back to it. I learnt these tricks at a training camp in Afghanistan, while there I met Mr Osama Bin Laden who was a thoroughly nice chap. He told me prior to 9/11 what was going to happen, but after realising who I was, bribed me, paying for ten publishing houses in the Middle Eastern region. Derik hadn’t trained with Taliban and wasn’t very useful in staying in silent.
“I have a bad feeling about this Dave, behind that corner are two beasts, big ugly creatures who might eat us”. Margot wasn’t speaking, it was Derik, just Derik, no one else, no spirit of 13th century prostitute, just derik…He was fearing the worst and showing it, with sweat pouring down his face and body movement that showed he wasn’t quite with it, shaking erratically with every step. Derik looked cool is his turquoise shell-suit, despite the blood from Fergal all over.
“One more step”, I said.
“Okay, but…” said Derik, still unsure.

“Hey, you! Yeah you around the corner” came a voice up the stairs.
We had nothing to lose, so together hand-in-hand we climbed the last step.

Then we looked, fearing we’d only see the face of reptoid, or worse, bullets from a platoon of mad swat men. But no, nothing bar a gorky speckled kid with a wooded sword.

“Hi, I’m Lanthon Thunder, king of all the wizards, elves and fairies in this fair land. You have entered my kingdom and must pay me 3 gold coins to pass through. If you don’t I will strike with my sword, or even worse I’ll banish you to the land of Mary Judd’s, where you work as slaves until you die.”
This kid was weird and we couldn’t take him seriously with such a high pitched girly voice, I had three gold coins but this turd wasn’t having them. So we just passed by him, hoping for no more trouble from the rpg geek. Unknowingly though, he crept up behind us and struck us both with heavy blows from his wooden sword. After equally being beaten to a pulp by the fantasist and consoling each other on our pains, the kid pulled out a wizard book of spells. Just as he was going to turn us into toads or something a man in a fur coat appeared round another corner. He was wielding a gun and running towards the geek who called himself Lanthon Thunder.

“F**k you Biiittccchh!!! Eugene, you will die!” said the fur coated pimp. Two shots from his gun then whistled out of his gun and Lanthon fell down, dead.”

He then spoke to us “Name’s Keats, Paul Keats. Want the hell you doing down here?”

[sign in to see URL]


Last edited by knights, 9/29/2005, 9:56 pm


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Re: The Truth In Lies 2: 7/7 The Great Yorkshire Patsies


Tonight's episode sponsored by Bridge Of Stupid Records Presents Dave And The Terrorists, featuring the hit singles "The Reptile Dance", "Yon Pimp At The Station", and "For Derik, My Lady". The first 25 discs will each include a copy of the new best-selling novel DVD's Are The Work Of An Unjust Reptillian God. Children, be sure to ask your Mullah's permission before buying.


"We're looking for the truth" said Dave. He could believe that as much as he wanted, but I was beginning to feel differently. Perhaps the truth might lie elsewhere. But not as John Edward had said, because he was such an obvious liar. Yet the name Shaz Tanweer must lead to something, and the telling of the name was the liar's last gesture.

Paul Keats said "truth? You sure seem to be looking for something. Can't help you there, mates, but I do have a few girls just outside of the station here. For a few-"

"No, no" said Dave. "we don't do that." Obviously, Dave only referred to himself when he said "we". I could have went a round or two then and there given the right female. Something about all the murder and the threat of my own impending doom really aroused me. But mind that I had not noticed this until Dave interrupted the pimp fellow. "I'm working on my friend here so you see I don't need women at all."

"Okay then" said the pimp "I'll let you fellows get back to whatever you were doing. You hold back till I'm gone or else. I've killed a man before so I ain't afraid." With that said he made his way out.

I asked Dave: "Working on your friend, are you?"

"Yes" he said. "Don't pretend to be stupid, Derik. I'm waiting for you to cross the bridge of love, then..."

"No Dave" I said. "Have you forgotten that we're here to find the truth about the bombing?"

At this comment, Dave seemed flustered.

Suddenly Paul Keats was violently flung back into scene. He landed on the floor, bleeding and near death.

"Fellows" said the pimp, barely audible, "run or they'll kill you. They killed me." Then, he died.

A horde of scraggly youths emerged with hate in their eyes. Dave and I could not run for they were upon us. Our only hope was to make friends with these people.

One of these youths stepped forward. He wore a fashionably modest knit sweater, and otherwise seemed to be of good bearing, but his face and hair were unkempt. A hippie, I mused, is a being of great timult(sp?) and is therefore unpredictable. Were I the police, I would beat them down, as well.

The youth spoke: "We're the Rezidant Ivil Fan Club And Commune and you two are in our way. Before the club votes on whether or not we'll kill you, give us one reason why we shouldn't destroy you."

"We agree with your purpose" Dave said. His ability to tell a good lie was something that would become legend. "In fact, I'm in the process of writing a book that compares the recent election in America to Rezidant Ivil: APotOfPiss."

The gang had almost been snagged by this lie, but suddenly they seemed much angrier and much closer.

"A Pot Of what?" asked another youth.

"The sequel, I mean" said Dave.

A collective gasp arose from the group. Surely, Dave had stepped into one of his own lies.

"Well, little man," said the first youth as he produced a large handgun from beneath his sweater, "you don't know the rules." He levelled the gun in the direction of Dave and I. "The first rule of Rezidant Ivil Club is you don't talk about Rezidant Ivil Club. The second rule is you don't talk about the films. The third rule is that all violators will be shot."

"Okay" I said. As angry as these people seemed to be, I must have been angrier, because I hated the Rezidant Ivil horror franchise. A more shameless attempt to make money has never been unleashed upon the world. Dave, however, had bought into this nonsense, and before all is over he might pay a big price for his gullability. "Dave is a violator. I am not. He has admitted to touching my genitals while I sleep."

Dave seemed quite shocked at this.

The fanboys were also taken aback. Blinded by science. In fact, this was all suddenly quite uncomfortable. Silence pounded my ears until one of them spoke:

"We are only here looking for Alex and Mike. Those Romero-loving elitists."

---
You see-there are two kinds of people in this world: those with loaded guns and those who dig. You dig.
9/30/2005, 4:18 am Link to this post Send Email to abaddon1215   Send PM to abaddon1215 MSN Yahoo Blog
 
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They disgusted me. These were the little turds that sat around all day listening to nu-metal and wore offensive t-shirts which made them look like big turds. Morons I thought to myself, they were misguided little dicks who go around slapping old granny’s for kicks and walked into Woolworth’s to steal the pick-a-mix sweets.
I myself had only played the resident evil games to look for symbolic elements that were littered all over the games. It was apparently based on a true story, that being the first one anyway. A source once told me this happened in a small town in Japan or somewhere, where a man named Forrest battled the illuminati’s zombies then had sex with then. They didn’t include that in the game of course, and Forrest was given a minor character role. When it came to the film, a small illuminati financier in Germany produced, in an effort to spin on the truths of the story, and it worked by targeting at the turd audience, just like these kids.
I didn’t like these kids, one wore a t-shirt with dead foetus on with the words ‘Abortion is Cool’, and the others had resident evil shirts. I had to get rid of them. I didn’t like them and I didn’t the liars that were Alex and Mike either.
I said, “Their down on the tracks, boys. Watch out though, they are dangerous and a lot older than you. There’s also a man called Cort down there, he was slagging you off. Better hurry if you wanna catch them.” And with that the turds ran off. Hopefully they’d all die, all die!
The passage was clear; we felt secure and finally got ourselves off the floor. The death toll was now at about eight, with these other turds lying there dead. Keats was okay i suppose, but Lanthon, or Eugune needed to die for being annoying.
We strolled along, hoping to god that no one would be around the next corner in this long passage. The passages were long and huge, unfortunately though god did come. Well, Christians anyway. These were the fundamentalists types with an evangelist leading the horde of 10-or so neurotics, hoping to make other people like me and Derik believe in fire and brimstone. They wanted to save us.
--Log in or sign up to see linked image content--
Hinn, Benny
The evangelist seemed familiar, had I seem him before? Then he spoke and I realised who he was. Benny Hinn was a conniving man, who through his shows had netted him a fortune. So rich he was that he had his own Christian TV channel and regularly appeared on the 700 club. He was a con-man though, and a good one, bit like Derik. He was from South Africa, I think. He toured the world saving sinners, but in truth it was not him, it was more the entertainment and the lights of his shows.
As they approached, they saw the carnage behind us, the two bodies that is.
Hinn spoke, just as his fellow Christian cronies held their hands over their mouths with shock. “You have sinned-a. What is this fellow brothers and sisters, two murderers on the run-a? In Hell Satan will vent spleen on these sinners-a.”
“We didn’t kill them.” Derik said.
Suddenly Hinn moved forward from the pack of his foolish vulnerables and held up his arms. “You’ll will be forgiven-a, my brothers you are sinners-a….” Then it hit him, Derik knew Hinn, although he thought I didn’t know. They trained at a con-artists school back in the mid-70’s. Hinn must have been shocked to see old friend. He seemed jilted by the fact that Derik could expose him. But I knew that wouldn’t happen. Hinn lowered his arms and placed his hands on Derik’s head while I stood by and watched. Then he spoke again, “In the name of Jesus-a, the son of god-a you will be saved-a. Let the power of god-a enter your body to see the light-a!”
Derik fell back as if saved by the lord.

---
The infamous Hinn spirit massacre of 2000
--Log in or sign up to see linked image content--

Some ugly christian fundamentalist hoe
--Log in or sign up to see linked image content--

[sign in to see URL]~mikesch/[sign in to see URL]
Sorry if this offended you, or your beliefs.

Last edited by knights, 9/30/2005, 11:49 am


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Re: The Truth In Lies 2: 7/7 The Great Yorkshire Patsies


(Author's Note: No Christians were harmed in the making of this little episode.)

I was quite surprised to see my colleague Benny Hinn here. Yes, I knew him, and I know this must be a shock to everyone. Derik Okra, legitimate spiritual medium, and Benny Hinn, spirit-slayin' evangelist, had been down the road of lies together. It's nothing to be proud of, but such is the truth. This is all so easy to admit as I stand next to my friend. Dave Pike: the troll that lives beneath the Bridge of Stupidity.

Given the particulars here, I knew it was necessary for Benny to save face before his followers. He whispered to me, asking if Dave was "cool". I responded that Dave would follow my lead, or so I wished.

Then Benny slapped my forehead, and I played along. I plopped the concrete. This hurt very much.

Benny exclaimed: "This heathen is healed by the power and the light and the blood of the lamb and the sacrement and the 1987 film, Graveyard Shift. But not the Stephen King film, which was but a hymn to the mongrel doggies of Failestine."

It was then Dave's turn to be healed.

"Be away from me" said Dave to the approaching Pastor Benniman Hinn. How funny this was to me, that Dave would reject a spiritual blessing. He needed one. A REAL ONE. "I'll stab your head off you Reptile cleric" continued Dave.

I decided to help my friend to not be murdered by these orthodox method actors. So I whispered towards Dave, hoping the faithful wouldn't hear: "The matrix was only a movie. Play along or die."

Dave gasped and couldn't help but look in my direction. He seemed totally flustered. Benny sensed that Dave wasn't quite ready, and thus moved slowly.

The holy man smiled and softly sad: ".....a special case....".

"What movie is this?" asked Dave. He was breathing heavily, and his eyes were almost bulging.

"Be healed" said Benny sharply as he slapped Dave's forehead.

Dave recoiled in horror. "You hit me" he said, in disbelief.

By this time, I had turned onto my side so I could watch my good friend. Benny's flock was ignoring me now that I'd been dealt with. Very lucky, I was, for these bastards could be quite blood thirsty when their trust is shaken. However, it usually took something massive to dislodge their trust. Like music. Or sexy clothes.

Instantly, I heard a voice, as if from beneath the earth's crust, softly rumble the words "finish him".

Benny, his smile broadening, lifted his hand, with palm facing up.

Dave couldn't have known what this act foretold, but he didn't like it. Then again, wouldn't Dave had come across Benny's realm of stupidity in the quest for anti-abortion rhetoric? Anyway, I prayed that my friend wouldn't have a heart attack before the pastor's act of deliverance was complete.

There was a flash.

Then a bolt of fire came from above onto Dave's head.

It was gone as quickly as it came, and Dave lay on the ground, dazed.

"SLLLLLLAAAAAAIIIIIIIINNNNNN" yelled Benny in triumph. He extended a hand to me and pulled me upwards till I stood as normal. "Happy hunting brothers, and best of luck. See you again perhaps."

And then Benny was gone, and his flock with him.

"I am slain" said Dave, still lying on the ground.

---
You see-there are two kinds of people in this world: those with loaded guns and those who dig. You dig.
10/5/2005, 4:40 am Link to this post Send Email to abaddon1215   Send PM to abaddon1215 MSN Yahoo Blog
 
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Re: The Truth In Lies 2: 7/7 The Great Yorkshire Patsies


Alex's [sign in to see URL] by the 'big men' and sent to Phallic Rock

Dave and Derik had just left, and just as their figures blurred in the distance, behind me came two other people. They were old man and a teenager, probably related.

They both stormed at the three us, that being me, Mike and Cort. Indeed it was Cort's time I thought to myself. The anti-Graveyard Shift people had found us, seeking to kill the last on their 'to kill' list. We had a scuffle, then I blanked out.

I don't know how I lost consciousness or for how long I was out, but when I awoke I, just like Mike had been was tied up, on a phallic rock. It was a rural place somewhere, and cold. My instinct told me it was Scotland, and that I was destined to be feasted on by the hierarchy of the western world in their apparent reptillian form. I didn't believe it at first, then I saw them. They wandered about in their true reptoid form, looking like characters from Alice in Wonderland, all dressed up in fancy clothing. It was night.

I could tell I must have been out for days as my body, especially my stomach was in severe pain from lack of food or water. I was naked too, which didn't help all too much either, as of course I sensed the need to escape from this very surreal place.

Every now and then, they'd come a peer at me as I struggled to break free, laughing in their deep alien voices, that made a lions roar seem like a fart in a Jacuzzi. I was all alone, naked and facing certain death.

My escape came through the naivety and ignorance of a small reptillian child, whom seemingly lost came and approached me while all the rest of these lizard beasts hosted a large human fry-up in a near-by mansion-sized tent.

Releasing me I vented my fury at the little reptoid tyke. Lifting him above my head with both arms and smashing his wailing body against the phallic rock. I soon pissed off. I ran through some near-by forestry and then blanked out, again.

When I awoke I sat up in amazement. Time was false and Mr Pike was right all along. It was just that no time had actually passed at all and I was fine. What had happened I thought to myself? Was I a prisoner of the matrix, just like Mr pike had said in his ramblings on the internet? I was back where I had blanked out the first time, right in the same spot on the tracks, however feeling fine, dandy, on top of the world!

Mike wasn't though, he was gone. I didn't know where either. Cort was slumped down on the tracks, but alive. Just like I he looked in peak shape as though nothing had happened.
Together we picked ourselves up and headed to the next station to find Mr Pike and Mr Okra to find some explanation over mine and possibly Cort's reptillian abduction. We needed answers more than anything.


---


10/12/2005, 12:41 am Link to this post Send Email to knights   Send PM to knights
 
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Re: The Truth In Lies 2: 7/7 The Great Yorkshire Patsies


Tonight's Episode: In New York [sign in to see URL] One Can Hear You Scream or What I Did During Autumn Vacation.

With every turn, finding the truth becomes more and more complicated. I realize this as I am somehow transported from the tubes(in Britain) to New York City. I thought this quite strange, as I lacked a spirit guide like Okra's Margot and this wasn't an episode of Star Trek. There was no doubt that my new surroundings were in New York City, because I could see the vast city skyline through a huge window.

I must admit that it horrified somewhat to realize that I was indeed inside of a skyscraper. The odds are roughly one in three-hundred million that the work of terrorists would destroy the skyscraper while I'm inside. Of course, factor into this equation my recent adventures, and surely those odds are much better, or worse, depending on perspective. It should also go without saying that if Okra or Pike were here, I'd not simply be frightened; I'd run like hell! For surely those two are cause enough to destroy the entire tri-state area.

Trying to shed these thoughts of my demise, I turned and surveyed the room. It was a nice size and furnished comfortably, if not a tad sparsely. Perhaps this was some sort of corporate sitting room. I had no time for sitting. The odds of my survival in this skyscraper were calculated by my brain, and therefore this was persistant in my stream of thought.

So I left the room and a hallway then confronted me. It wasn't very big, but I felt anything other than a door labelled "exit" was too much to bother with at this time. As I traversed the hallway, something caught my eye-a picture depicting a naked man atop the great abomination itself. Phallic Rock.

With shock I realized that the naked man was indeed Alex.

Oh, I thought, I guess he's broken-in now. This was not funny, no matter the amount of drugs and alcohol involved. However, my sense of grief was dulled by the fact that I had experienced this and survived. I knew Alex would also survive. He would need to clean up afterwards, too. I would remind him of this if I get back to the tubes.

There was only one real piece of advice I could offer my now damaged Comrade-In-Truth-In-Lies: use caulk. Caulk had saved my insides from falling out after those Reptiles had their way with me. I recall that after the incident I stayed in my home for a long time, with only caulk to aid me. But, in my solitude, I retained a burning feeling to get payback. This was merely cold comfort as my struggles were often too horrible to bear. I would ask my parents to go out and purchase caulk for 'my problem', and they would respond with a mistrustful glare. I'd realize that I suffered from a speech impediment, meaning that I speak with a Southern accent. Other sufferers rarely understood their native tongues either. "No" I'd say, "not cock-I've got one of those. Caulk, I said. And you'd best not tell the neighbors. That's right. The first rule of Caulk Club is DON'T TALK ABOUT CAULK CLUB. And I won't bother with a second rule, because this isn't a movie."

Continuing along the hallway, I noticed a movie poster. It depicted Graveyard Shift(not the Stephen King film or book), but it looked quite different. The cheapness of the poster made the whole thing laughable. I looked closer at the poster. 1987. Graveyard Shift. Cortland Eliot. Vampire. City in background. All of the pieces were right, but this was not the poster from Cort's classic film.

Then I noticed something strange. The Nineteenth Century Foks emblem was not present on this poster! Neither that corporation, nor Unabursal Pikchars, Gamblin' Interdrainment, Spleenbursts, Toughdrone, Lucasfilths, Mirrorsmacks, Banker Sleigh, Stony, Fartyman, Screenjerks, or any other motion picture company(that I recognized) were mentioned on the poster. Sheesh, I thought, the film didn't have studio support. What a world, what a world, the wicked witch once said, and I thought this was a good time for myself to chime in.

In small print, a tiny review hid below the slightly larger list of cast and crew: "This movie is easily as good as Zombie 2."

Oh great, I thought. Perhaps I would buy this on DVD so that I can melt it onto the genitals of my enemies.

As I neared the opposite end of the hallway, a stranger thing confronted me: the dust jacket taken from a book entitled Revelations Of A Phallic Rock Survivor. What the all-ee-all-ee-oxen-free was this? Apparently, I was the Survivor of subject, and this was true. But I blacked out when I saw the author's name. David Pike.

I had not the time to become angry before I woke up, back in the tubes to find myself alone.

In the distance, I heard sounds of an argument and a physical altercation of some sort.

I stood and realized that I felt good. This was fine, because I also felt like fighting-

before I noticed the little Reptillian that was standing several meters away, opposite the noises. He raised what looked like his arm, and seemed to make some sort of gesture. I could understand what this meant, and I had no time to figure it out.

So I made off towards the sounds with more than a little anger in my heart. I was a Phallic Rock Survivor, and hopefully Alex would be alive and well. It would be a club-a brotherhood. We, the Phallic Rock Survivors, would make the Reptillians very sorry that we hadn't been compensated for our troubles. The big swamp beasts would rue the day that they took pleasure from our dookie holes.

I laughed as I ran, and I remembered that I was Abaddon1215 before I discovered the internet. Oh yes, I was Abaddon 12:15! And if Pike and Okra stood in the way of my vengeance, they would fall. Quickly.

Because Abaddon 12:15 said so.

---
The greatest trick The Devil ever pulled was convincing the world that he isn't real.
10/15/2005, 6:54 pm Link to this post Send Email to abaddon1215   Send PM to abaddon1215 MSN Yahoo Blog
 
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Re: The Truth In Lies 2: 7/7 The Great Yorkshire Patsies


My gosh, the bolt came out of nowhere and when I awoke I felt like a changed man. Things had happened when Benny Hinn, the dignified man of god had touched me. I had a deeper sense of things around me, as though I had been fine tuned to pick up the spiritual realm I had once shunned. And as I opened my eyes that first time, being a reborn man three figures looked down upon me. Thankfully they weren’t dead. Alex and Cort were there you see, and my humble friend Derek. Benny though, he’d gone. I needed to see what was happening on the outside world, above the tubes. In my rucksack I delved once again, this time for my laptop, the ultimate in wireless technology.
I logged in with my three friends huddled behind me, peering in on my activities. As I opened internet explorer the usual happened, being that I was bombarded by spam pop-ups to bestiality websites that I usually frequent every now and again. My favourite was the site with horse giving it to the elderly man doggy style on a hay-stack. While Alex and Cort sat behind me laughing, Derek kept his silence, knowing he too liked to browse these sites. We’d usually re-enact the scenes from the videos on the sites together back at my mansion. He’d wear a horse’s head, while I rammed myself between his buttocks. Anyways, after clearing my screen of the shark, racoon, gorilla, and hamster porn I typed the address. I’d need to see what was actually going on above us.
It was the BBC news website; an illuminati slanted news media which I knew would bring partial truths into the story regarding me, Derik and the madman who attacked Blair the other day.

My jaw dropped when seeing the slander on this site – Dave Pike’s nazi links; Dave Pike wants to YOUR gas children; Dave Pike recruited the 9/11 hijackers; Okra may have cause Aids; Day 5 in the underground, Gunshots heard. Pike and Okra have started to execute child hostages. MI5 may swoop soon.
All of the stories were crap, and like me Derik just slumped down and put his head in hands while under his breathe saying that “we’re all screwed.”

We couldn’t go up now, so we needed to go back and follow the tracks once more, already knowing the dangers down there too. The tracks seemed a lot safer though. With one wrong turning in these stations we could be pummelled by bullets or attacked by a reptoid out on revenge for Blair’s attack.

Alex asked to use the laptop briefly. We all sat around while he did this not having a clue what he was doing. Once he found what he was looking for he called me over while the others, Cort and Derik turned away.
Alex pointed at the screen. “Look Dave, your madness has manifested. There are people on the internet who are decoding the Truth In Lies roleplay and are saying that me and Mike are Reptillians. Dave, we are not and clearly these people have been fooled. Fooled by you, into a paranoid don’t-trust-anything-or-anyone cause of thought.”
Maybe he was right. I was always an eccentric, and at this moment reflected on my old school days when I first learnt on how to lecture and patronise people. Back then I convinced the whole school that our headmaster shapeshifted into a playboy model if they asked him for a ‘One on one in the broom cupboard’. Eventually he bummed his way through the whole school and it was at this moment I got my first paycheck from the headmaster himself for what he said was a ‘fine arse job’. I felt guilty afterwards of course, though the desire to bathe myself in pennies came as a priority to me back then.
I offered hope, albeit false. People want a reason for why this world can be so hard on them and I offered it and they believed without a pinch of salt. Now I live in a mansion and have a fleet of cars.
My minions were smart, that being the people who believed my writings. They had been programmed and I was their master. On the webpage Alex showed they had linked him and Mike to George Bush and the illuminati, as well as finding the important so-called keywords that were meant to mean something. Like Abaddon1215, which was decoded into A BAD MAN IN 1215 CALLED DON. Of course though, it was hogwash.


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10/18/2005, 7:02 am Link to this post Send Email to knights   Send PM to knights
 


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